Recently Kyle made a comment to me after I was upset over something. He said, ” You have a hard time of letting things go.”
This may or may not come as a surprise to you…for me it clarified a lot of feelings I have had all my life. Sometimes you just need someone to point it out for you…
I have an extremely hard time letting parts of my life past. Once they are past, I resent anyone that gets to continue on in my stead. I look at them with extreme jealousy while remember all of the wonderful memories I had and they will continue to have. Need examples?
I came back to a couple of shows after graduating only to feel a sore spot. I wanted to be on the stage. I missed it a lot. UW drama is a lot different and more vulgar than high school so I resisted getting involved….Whenever a song comes on from one of my past high school musicals I sing with gusto and sadness…it kinda sucks…
This place has been such a HUGE part of my life. Heck I met my husband here…so of course it has a lot of significance in my life. I have gone every summer since 1999 and this past summer was the first that I didn’t go…It was HARD. Not being there I cried at home but it was worse being there for a short amount of time. I was SOOOO jealous of all the new counselors and all the memories and trials they would share
I am still involved in institute, I still go to classes and feel like I am fairly well known there. But because I am married…it’s a little different. I don’t feel like I can get AS involved because in reality most of it is mainly for Young Single Adults….I felt a tinge of envy for all of the new people who showed up for the opening social… Kyle and I arrived late because they asked us to help out..well they didn’t even need us…so I just got to observe and get mad…HOORAY! NOT.
I thought about switching you out for Kristin when she kept using "Not Allen" as an answer, but unfortunately we ran out of time. I'm sorry if I wound up in some level making you feel like you weren't part of the opening social fun. Still it was good to see you, and I'm glad we have a class together. After all it isn't every day a convert knows more about the gospel than I do… wait yes it is. 😉
The institute stuff gets even WORSE for people who have graduated.